Lock it up! Now!

A Chastity Toy Box Tease, Part 1.

It’s my favorite month!  It’s October, the time of scarves, leggings, fuck-me boots, and pumpkin spiced everything.  It’s the time of football, leaves changing, fire pits, and Halloween.  October is also a special time of year in the kink community; it’s Locktober!  It’s the time when penis owners who practice chastity kink attempt to lock up those cocks for the entire month!  So, of course, my Toy Box Teases of this month would be on cock cages!  This is such a great topic, I’m actually going to make this a two-part blog post.   

What is a cock cage?  It is a chastity device for penis owners.  The most common device is called a ball trap cage and consists of a ring that sits behind both testicles and attaches to a cage that fits over the penis which then locks to the ring.  The purpose is to prevent the penis from becoming erect.  Cages can be of different materials: plastic, acrylic, silicone, metal, rubber, and resin.  With the advent of 3D printing, specially molded cages are also becoming popular.  The cages are locked either by a separate padlock or an internal locking mechanism.  The person in charge of the key is referred to as the Keyholder.  

There is no definitive answer to who started Locktober, but I first read a 2017 Tumblr blog “Keep Him Locked: A Wife’s Guide to Male Chastity and Cock Cages” long since lost in the porn purge of 2019.  It was a great introduction to the tease and denial fun that can be had with chastity during Locktober.  The idea is simple, 31 days of continuous chastity, but in truth how you participate is up to you.  Some people cage for a period of time each day but are unlocked for sleep.  Some practice complete orgasm denial, and others allow for ruined orgasms.  Ultimately, you need to do what works best for your physical and mental health. House of Denial’s Mistress K (not me), has a fantastic article on how to prepare, ways to participate in Locktober, and great tips for chastity play.

Chastity is not a new kink.  Cock cages and chastity devices have been around for a long time!  The idea of the chastity belt to protect and safeguard the purity of women in medieval times has been around so long that it’s commonly used as a joke in pop culture such as Robin Hood, Men in Tights, even though they weren’t actually used at the time.  Male chastity devices were around in Victorian times as an anti-mastubatory device. It was the original “no fap” movement that thought that masturbation, rather than being the perfectly healthy activity that it is, would lead to a range of physical and mental disorders.  Modern cock cages are designed for the kinky purpose of controlling another person’s genitals with their enthusiastic consent.  No one should ever be coerced or forced to engage in chastity.

The first time my husband brought up the idea of chastity was sometime around 2007, before we were in the lifestyle and before I had begun my kink journey.  I didn’t understand why anyone would want to practice this.  What was the appeal, and why would I want my husband’s cock locked away from me?  I didn’t understand what my husband would get out of it.  Why would he want to lock up his cock and not be able to get an erection? Frankly I thought the whole thing was weird, but I was willing to try it and see what happened.

One of the biggest things we learned early on is that being in the right headspace for chastity is crucial for it to be enjoyable for both partners.  Entering into the chastity experiment thinking that it was weird didn’t set us up for success.  I also really hated the first cage we tried which was the CB-3000.  It’s not cheap at about $150. My husband fit into the cage pretty well although the shaft length was a bit too long.  It was clear plastic and locked with a small padlock.  When my husband was wearing it, his penis just looked smushed and unappealing.  I didn’t know what I was supposed to feel when I saw him wearing it, but I figured the desire to look away probably wasn’t good.  While we enjoyed the teasing, the aesthetics meant that I had a tendency to lock it and forget it.  This is a common mistake for many Keyholders.  

The pros for this particular device was that it is very lightweight and very comfortable.  It’s actually a pretty popular cage for many couples.  The kit comes with several sizing rings to help get a good fit, which is the most difficult aspect of ordering a cock cage.  Some of the cons for me included the overall look, hygiene, and the padlock.  I didn’t like the clear plastic, and the padlock bruised my pubic area whenever I would ride his cock to tease him.  It was also difficult for him to stay clean as there wasn’t as much ventilation, which caused an odor.  However the lack of ventilation in this design covered more of the shaft and reduced chafing.  Our cage eventually broke.  It partially split along a seam and pinched my husband pretty badly.  Between that experience and being in the wrong headspace for chastity play, we took a long break before we attempted caging his cock again.

By the time we were ready to try chastity once more, we had started down the road to non-monogamy.  My husband had already given me control of his orgasms and this was a tangible expression of that commitment.  We were already enjoying some components of chastity play like edging, tease and denial, and humiliation.  Chastity play as a kink looks different for everyone, and this is by no means a how-to guide.  Chastity play is like any other toy in our toy box.  It’s a way to enhance our sexual connection and explore our own sexuality.  

The next cage that we tried was metal.  This was a completely different experience for me.  I was in a better, more dominant headspace where I was desiring even more control over him.  I also LOVED the look of a metal cage.  There is a medieval appeal to seeing my husband’s cock caged behind metal bars. The first time I put the metal cage on his penis, I immediately wanted to taste and tease him through the cage.  If I was repulsed by the smushed look of the plastic cage, I was drawn irresistibly to the medieval look of his cock being constrained with metal.  With this cage, chastity was a completely different experience, and I began to understand the appeal of the kink in general terms and personally.

I enjoy chastity play because by removing the possibility of sex while also making my husband very aware of his penis with the cage, he has to find other ways to express his sexual desire for me.  This means that he will happily give me massages or find excuses to touch and be near to me.  As one of my love languages is touch, this is wonderful for me.  It’s like putting someone on a diet and making yourself their cheat day! 

Final Rundown of the CB-3000

Pros

• Comfortable, light weight
• Lack of chaffing
• Easy  to use

Cons

• Odor from lack of ventilation
• Personal dislike of Aesthetics.
• External lock
• Safety
• Cost 

While I know that the CBX brand is the gold standard for many chastity participants, it did not work for us.  While we enjoyed the idea of chastity play, the lack of visual appeal, the discomfort from the lock, and the malfunction of the toy stacked up as a poor value for our needs.  I give this toy 1.5 stars out of 5.  If it had been in a different color, or if I had been in the correct headspace to enjoy this cage, the score might be higher.

Recently we ventured back into plastic cock cages and bought a 3D printed cage from Kink3D.  I will detail our experiences with that and do a final run down of all our cages in my next blog post. As usual, here is my quick disclaimer that I am not a licensed health or sexual expert, all opinions are my own and do not constitute medical advice.  Join me on the Mōn app to discuss Locktober and chastity.  If you enjoyed this post, reach out to me on Twitter or Instagram with more ideas.  If you want to support more reviews, please consider buying me a coffee.